Monday, December 21, 2009

Belly Dancer.....not this lady!

Belly Dancing
Sounds exotic right?!
It is....
If your thin, beautiful and coordinated.
I tried it....I suck.
Here is how I came about trying to shake my jello rolls.
I hurt my knee so I cant do the elliptical.
I saw sign ups for Belly Dancing and I thought,
"OOOhhhh, Thats sounds like fun, I love to shake what my momma gave me"
I figured all you do is shake your stuff so my knee would be fine.
Crazy instructor lady with the bright red tacky flowers in her hair tried to kill me.
First, they hand you this sash with those horrid coins on them.
Yeah, I had to find one to fit my hips....nice ego bashing there.
We start off and I realize holding my hands above my head doing weird snake like moves KILLS.
I felt like i was bench pressing my husband.
Then the hips shaking started.
She had us turning in weird circles and line dancing.
There is something wrong with feeling the fat in your butt jiggle that bad DURING a workout.
Made me very thankful for the hideous coin covered sash to hide it.
No one deserved to see that.
After the 50 minute class was over, My body hurt and I realized I am not as coordinated as I thought.
Don't get me wrong I can drop it like its hot.
I can not look sexy trying to belly dance.
I know....because I had to do this in front of a mirror.
I have to say Belly Dancing-1
Poor Chunky uncoordinated mom of 3 with the bum knee-0


WhisperingWriter said...

I wouldn't be able to belly dance either. I am so uncoordinated, I'd go dancing into a wall.

Chelsea said...

OMG you just made me spit out my water. You are TOO funny!